Cheap Date: Learning a Language

Sometimes the stock market increases 15% year over year. Sometimes we bump up interest rates because growth and inflation and moving too quickly. And sometimes ordinary people buy unaffordable houses with strange loan products because the home is guaranteed to double in value (in a short, short time). That sometime is not today. While the country’s fiscal vitality is showing signs of a perk up (except for a certain symbolic flagship auto manufacturer, that is), us ordinary Toms are having a tough go of it.

Rather than cry in our Mad Dog 20/20, we can make our own fun. We don’t have to drop ducats on theater tickets, surf-and-turf specials, trips to St. Bartholomew’s or season passes to Six Flags to have a great time on a date. You can get creative and do something much better. This time around, learn a language together…

Love in the Time of Layoff: Bankers Are to 2007 as ________ Are to 2009

Last week we found ourselves on a two woman bar tour, consisting of just ourselves. We were flitting between two groups of guys, one group was at Spitzer’s and another across the street at ‘inoteca. After a glass of wine and some assorted cheeses at ‘inoteca, we would dash to Spitzer’s to chow on truffle mac and cheese with some Aussies. Had we not been so amused by our own antics, we would have gone home pleading a ‘breakfast meeting,’ well that and the cutie in a suit stationed in the doorway of Spitzer’s, who had been frantically blackberrying for the better part of an hour. So stoic was his demeanor that we just had to dub him the Downtown Centurion. One of us and we won’t say who (we do write for Dating a Banker Anonymous) was about to make her fourth entrance of the night when the Downtown Centurion deigned to speak to her. She had taken to switching up her hair and taking off her leather jacket that was “totally giving her street cred” every time she switched locations.

Downtown Centurion: You forgot to take your hair down.

DABA Girl (smooth): Huh?

Downtown Centurion (eyes still on BlackBerry): You’ve been taking your hair down and putting your jacket on every time, you come in. Don’t mess up your flow now. Although personally, I’d be interested in seeing the jacket off and hair down combo, but maybe you’re saving that for later?…

Pampering to Plump the Economy

We’ve heard the nation’s leaders warn that we can’t really dig ourselves out of this economic ditch until consumer confidence returns—in other words, until we all feel safe enough to get out there and shop. But this plan of action feels rash. Excessive, reckless, down-payment-in-shoes-style consumption is what got us into this mess. And who needs another pair of strappy sandals anyway? But there is one kind of shopping that can help make a difference. It’s the most indulgent, frivolous, pamper-me style shopping—the kind you’ve probably become too monkish to consider. But it’s the best thing for the economy, and for your toes, especially if you’re wearing last year’s styles.

One of the best ways to stimulate the economy yourself is to spend money on personal services, according to Dean Baker, founder of the Center for Economic Policy Research. “Personal services” is finance code for manicures and pedicures, facials, babysitters, lawn care, and dog groomers. Apparently, this is a more efficient and effective form of consumerism, for yourself and the economy as a whole. Service industries generally have low overhead and spend more of their revenue on paying staff than a typical store. They are also often locally owned, keeping your dollars not just within the country’s borders, but in your own community…

Love in the Time of Layoff: 5 Dating Tips for the Recession

First dates at Le Cirque and second dates in St. Barth’s are out (for me, and maybe you, they were never in, but you get the point). Everyone’s feeling pressure on their wallets, and so for a lot of folks, that means pressure on the dating budget. What are the dating experts advocating in the downturn?

Mainly: Be cheap and be wary. Be very wary.

We don’t really agree with the sentiment of “being cheap” – no one should blow their wad on a few casual dates, of course, but a relationship is an investment and “being cheap” might not be a great way to start. But who are we to say?

Here’s how the pros see it:

* Curb your dating. According to dating expert David Wygant, there are some compulsive daters out there…

Domestic Violence and Money

This isn’t the happiest of news, nor all that new, but we thought it important to participate in the coverage of a report by cosmetics maker Mary Kay that shows an uptick in domestic violence related to financial woes.

From the study, in which 600 shelters were polled:

• Seventy-three percent of shelter representatives attribute the rise in abuse to “financial issues.”
• “Stress” and “job loss” (61 percent and 49 percent, respectively) also proved to be leading contributing factors in the reported increase in domestic violence cases involving women…
  
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Pawn That Engagement Ring!

You both thought two months salary would last forever…but it never got that far. But just because your heart is broken doesn’t mean you have to break the bank staying financially afloat during this recession.

These days ‘the pawn shop’ is online. The site IDoNowIDon’t.com has seen record site visits and “a banner month for product sales,” says the owner. One ex-fiancee hawked her $30,000 five-carat, Bulgari-inspired engagement ring online and fetched $18,000 to help her pay off debts and start a new company…

Recession Lexicon: Brokavore

/n. Foodies who are low on cash aren’t just your ordinary brand of foodies: they’re “brokavores.” So says the brilliant new site Brokelyn, started by writer Faye Penn. A takeoff on “locavore,” someone who eats locally grown or produced food, a brokavore is “an obsessively cheap but highly discerning eater.”

ex. The brokavore sought out hot dog stands, pretzel vendors, shawarma trucks and taco joints for local delights.

Maps of the Recession

Think your town has it worst? You could be right. But to be sure, there are a plethora of maps, lists and other round-up prognoses attempting to help you determine just how bad it is from city to city. Here are two of the latest.

AP: Economic Stress Map
The Associated Press has rolled out its Economic Stress Index, which uses basic economic indicators like jobs, foreclosures and bankruptcies to find heat maps of good times and bad. You can watch videos of real people who have suffered the downturn. But the map comes with a self-serious accompanying story that makes us ask, Really, is this necessary?…

5 Ideas for Frugal Summer Fun

Here comes the sun, and we’re all dreaming of pearly beaches and swaying palm trees. Summer frolicking doesn’t have to be expensive: Here are a few ways to enjoy the summer without digging too deeply into your pockets.

Plan a potluck barbecue:

Fire up the grill and have your friends over for a barbecue extravaganza. Cut down on costs by having each person bring something. Assign menu items like main dishes, salads, desserts, beverages, along with stuff like napkins and cups to make sure you have enough of everything. Turn ordinary hamburgers and hotdogs into a special treat by creating a topping bar that boasts snazzy items like fruit salsa or unusual hot sauces. For an inexpensive dessert, cut peaches or mangoes in half and put them flesh-down on the grill; then serve with a scoop of ice cream.

Take a hike:

Some parks charge entrance fees, but lots of prime hiking spots are free. Grab a good pair of shoes and a few friends and take off on a nature-lover’s adventure. Your city likely has nearby trailheads that can be accessed for an easy day hike. Spectacular parks around the country that you can access for nada include Great Basin National Park on the Nevada/Utah border, the Buffalo National River in Arkansas (fees only apply to camping), and Alaska’s Katmai National Park and Preserve. There are plenty of choices for sturdy backpacks that won’t break the bank. At $75, the Teton Sports Wilderness 55 is a bargain, boasting a rainfly for the top and zippered side pockets…

Five Cheap Wardrobe Tricks

The dilemma: It’s spring, and you’re dying for the new look blossoming in fashion magazines and store windows—but you have very little money these days to buy anything.

This year, I had particular need for a wardrobe refresh. With my new book coming out (In Her Own Sweet Time: Unexpected Adventures in Finding Love, Commitment and Motherhood), I was going to be touring the country giving readings. But since I work from home, my uniform generally consists of jeans, a T-shirt, and a comfortable pair of clogs. And like most people, my bank account is screaming extreme frugality much more than extreme luxury.

But transforming your look doesn’t have to mean spending an exorbitant amount—it just means getting creative. I called Samantha von Sperling, director of Polished Social Image Consultants in New York, for a little help. Von Sperling has produced style identities for celebrities, royalty, business executives and regular Joes…