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25 Random Things, Facts, Habits, or Goals About the Recession

We think all those Notes about random things have sharked, but then we ran across this one on Facebook:

Here are the rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about the recession. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about the recession from you.

1.) You’ll begin to think back wistfully to the days when dentists commonly put in gold fillings.
2.) Working out can be loosely defined to include being laid off.
3.) Lifting weights can include carrying boxes out of your office and if you’re really stretching it that security next to you could be called a spotter.
4.) There’s no makeup from the Dollar Store that a little paint thinner can’t fix.
5.) You’ll get to know the inside of the subway much better, perhaps even the inside of the clerk’s booth.
6.) Gourmet cat food can look like regular gourmet if you squint hard enough. (Or, make clever use of that Sharpie you stole on your way out the office door.)
7.) If you’re really stuck, two styrofoam cups and some string can function as a PDA.

8.) Soup kitchens don’t check IDs to see you’re really homeless.
9.) Don’t waste money on group therapy. Hijacking the conversation at Weight Watchers works just as well, plus you aren’t allowed to eat at the meetings so you might lose a few pounds.
10.) Going to another borough can be considered a vacation.
11.) Eating ethnic food can include Ramen.
12.) Guys, most girls are no longer holding out for Harry Winston or Tiffany. If Walmart offers a proof of authenticity she’s yours.
13.) On the bright side, you no longer have to pay for resume paper and postage.
14.) If you have to sell your computer you won’t need to worry if a place has wi-fi.
15.) Not washing your hair that often actually has benefits.

16.) More places are open for bartering. That said, not sure what you’d do in exchange with your accountant.
17.) Your clothes may be stuck in dry cleaning purgatory since you can’t pay your bill but just think—what would you wear those clothes for now, anyway?
18.) Cheap date can be completely redefined.
19.) The place to meet an investment banker is still downtown. Not Wall Street, but the unemployment office.
20.) Life coaches will start to hit on you.
21.) Yes, your kids probably do think you’re a loser.
22.) When you say you’re going to the wash and fold you might be talking about your company’s accounting department.
23.) If you find yourself working on the weekend every weekend you’re probably about to get laid off.
24.) Never a bad idea to bring extra tote bags to the office—just in case. Walking out with a box or trash bags just lacks a certain something.
25.) You may still be doing a share out in Long Island this summer, but splitting a studio in Rego Park may not exactly be what you had in mind.

Caroline Waxler is a writer, editor, producer and digital media consultant living in New York City.

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